We Are Nowhere And It's Now

I used to have a friend named Thuy.  I met her playing 10/20 unlimited holdem at the Commerce.  Thuy was cool.  She was good at no limit, not the most common thing for a girl.  And she was super laid back.

Thuy had cancer.  She had her leg amputated a few months before the summer of 2010.  But that didn’t stop Thuy from coming out to Vegas for the WSOP and crashing at my condo in Turnberry.  

A group of us went to the Rhino one night and I was separated from Thuy.  The next morning at my place she was there. She had driven home the night before, drunk and with one leg, and couldn't remember any of it.

I started the first draft of this blog out complaining.  But I didn’t have my leg amputated and I have yet to die of cancer like Thuy eventually did. 

So I said, “Self, stfu with all your complaining.  Nobody wants to read it.”

Then, in that first complain-y draft I put a quote that said “…the world doesn’t stop you from succeeding; you’re not that big of a deal."  And that quote reminded me of Thuy.  That’s how this post was born.

I went to Virginia to visit Thuy in the hospital as she was succumbing to her disease.  She told me about the priest that would come in to chat with her and the questions she would ask him.  Then she said this very profound thing that I wish I could remember the exact words to.  It’s something about being the most important thing to ever be created and the least meaningful thing to ever exist all at the same time.

So yea, the universe doesn’t give a shit about whether I succeed or not, it neither roots for me or against.  I find this comforting and intimidating at the same time.